Summary from Dr Laura Markham article
( Your child, better behaved in 3 days )
Day one: Focus on your own emotions
It starts with you before your child. Your emotions will have a big impact on both yourself and your child. Having your cup half empty will not assist you “Keep your cup full” as Dr Laura says.
Remember the safety instructions on the airplane. You were told first to help yourself, then help others. Same analogy goes when raising calm children. Be aware of your emotions first.
Encourage yourself on every little achievement you obtain, be happy, and calmness will crawl to you. Believe me, I have tried it and it works. When you are emotionally stable and happy, you can take on any challenges your kids will throw at you.
Day two : Keep practicing lessons from day 1 and build on them
Today’s focus will be on building healthy relationships and connecting with your child. Make sure you show affection, give them lots of hugs, and be there when they need you.
Dig deep and look for the good your child does. Give positive feedback and show your presence. Even if they are acting out, and it wasn’t the perfect day, still look at the bright side and find something good they have done. There’s no human on earth that lacks goodness in them for sure! Keep trying and you shall find it.
If it’s still not working, maybe you and your child need a third day. And that’s totally normal, so don’t stress about it.
Day three: Build on day 1 and 2
Consistency is what you need to achieve a long term calm environment in your home.
Today’s goal is to try your utmost not to act out of emotion towards your child.
It can be difficult, and I understand as I’m still practicing holding my horses when things are out of control. How can you achieve that calmness, Do the following steps:
1: Use a calm tone to communicate with your child.
2: Set some limits when they are misbehaving.
3:Tell them what they can and can’t do
Example : “I think you wanted to have a rest so you screamed at your sister, no screaming please.“ In this example you have communicated in a calm way, set the limits, and told your child what to do and what not to do.
Keeping up these 3 strategies will help you control your anger, as well as getting positive feedback and cooperation from your child.
Read the strategies as an overview then apply them day to day for more effective results. You are more than welcome to come back to the post again if you need to, I will be delighted to see you visit my site. Also feel free to share your experience in the comment section below.
Have a peaceful & calm home